our story.

I suppose it is time. 

Time to tell my our story of infertility.

You may want to sit down, this could be a while….. 😉

Image(Celebrating our 1st anniversary at Discovery Cove)

After a year of marriage, filled with ups, downs, and all arounds.. we decided that we would love to start a family. Sure, we had fur babies but we wanted an extension of ourselves. A little being.. a little of me, a little of him. 

“That won’t be to hard!”… or so we thought…

 

Fast forward nine months later.. No baby.

And to the doctor we go. 

We started at the naval hospital. The doctor was rude. She questioned my desire and doubted my ability to parent a child.

So I asked for a referral. And she gave it to me.. seeing as how it had already been nine months with no success. 

 

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So we decide to give it six more months.. No baby.

Our appointment with the fertility specialist was scheduled for the monday after my 21st birthday. Perfect. I’ll have my fun and then I’ll prepare to be a mom!

 

The appointment went well. It was decided that I have Endometriosis. For those who don’t know what this disease is… Allow me to share.

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Basically.. lesions. All over the place. Uterus. Fallopian tubes. Ovaries. Just everywhere. And it is PAINFUL. 

So to fix this wonderful endometriosis, I had what is called a laparoscopy & hysteroscopy. It was an awful surgery that took much longer than it should have and ended with me ALMOST dying. Scary stuff but I am ALIVE! And they believe that they were able to eliminate all of the lesions!

So after healing from the beast of a surgery I had, I underwent what is called a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG for short). For this procedure, a dye is inserted into the uterus through the cervix (big words, I know) and a real time X-ray visualizes the flow into the uterus, through the fallopian tubes, and into the ovaries. Basically, they want to know if there is any blockage that an egg could not pass. 

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So no blockages for me! Very good news.

I then had a slew of tests that required a donation of a good amount of blood.. all of which came back normal. And of course.. my husband had some tests of his own.

Everything looked good and it was time to begin treatment!

 

Our first treatment was called “Ovulation Induction”. Basically.. I take a few pills. My follicles (with eggs inside) grow (inside the ovary). I have an ultrasound. I take an injection. And we get down to business. 

A few months of this goes on and still we have nothing. 

So we move on to something called “Mini Stim”. This treatment is just the same but with HEFTIER drugs. 

A few months of this.. still nothing.

We meet with the doctor, who does not understand why this has not worked for us, and he explains that we may benefit from IUI (Intrauterine Insemination.. think turkey baster) or IVF (Invito Fertilization.. think test tube).

At this point.. nobody but us knows about our situation. It is tearing us apart inside and we need to talk to someone. So we call that wonderful MIL of mine and lay it all out. Of course, she had already suspected it but we now have confirmed it. I’m not sure if it was embarrassment or what.. but we felt as if we could’t tell anyone. But now we had a support system and we felt a little better.

 

At this point, my husband was scheduled for a 7 month deployment. We felt as if it was a sign to take a break. And take a break was exactly what we did. Then I was accepted into nursing school and we extended our break just a little more.

But then we couldn’t handle it anymore. We made an appointment in June of this year and the doctor had suggested a NEW treatment called “Mega Stim”. Sound familiar? It is indeed the same treatment we had tried before but with even HEFTIER drugs than the heftier drugs. I’m not sure we are convinced. 

 

We have decided that IVF will be our next option. But of course, our insurance does not cover this treatment since it is considered “elective” and “not essential”.

So we will have to wait. Until we have the money to undergo this procedure and MAYBE.. just maybe finally fill that empty hole in our hearts. Hopefully it will be sooner versus later but until then, we keep trying 🙂 With no expectations. 

And we hold on to hope..

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So that is our story. If you have questions about ANYTHING pertaining to infertility or our story, I will answer. It helps for me to talk about it. And now the whole WORLD knows that we are a part of the 7.3 MILLION people who suffer from this heartbreaking disease. And.. it is okay to talk about it. 🙂

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(On our 5th anniversary. Happy as ever ❤ )

Thank you for reading.

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10 thoughts on “our story.

  1. Amanda, I am so sorry to hear of your struggles with infertility and if you ever want to talk to someone that has been almost EXACTLY the same thing you have and more please feel free to message me or call and we can swap stories and I can give you an understanding ear, and who knows, maybe some insight. Much love to you both ❤ Carole

  2. Hi Amanda and Jay
    That must have taken alot to be able to share your intimate struggle of making a baby. You will now be able to recieve emotional support when needed.
    It is obvious when you look at my family you realize that i to was in your shoes. We went through 4 years of drs and procedures. Then we started the adoption process. If there is one thing that i want to share it is…..adoption is very simular to being pregnant, just without the labor part. What i mean by this is that…we made the decision to adopt, then came paperwork, interviews, approval (this i consider the conception), tthen comes the waiting (gestational period), then comses the phone call telling you there is a baby boy waiting to meet us (labor starts), we meet….we melt and yes it is love at first sight, now we must wait 24 hrs before giving our desision (we didnt wait), 2 days later and the day has come to pick up *our* new baby boy. When the worker walked in with Justin we melted when she put him in my arms and we were told we could take him home ( the delivery).
    By telling you this i just want you to realize that there is always a way to have a baby. Both you and Jay are good people and whatever path you choose will be the right one for your family ❤

  3. I have all the faith in the world that one day you will have the family you so desire. Yes, speak with Carole. She will have some insight for you also. Love you both!…..

  4. Awww Amanda I am so sorry to hear about your struggles with having a little one! I just want to tell you I know of 3 different people that struggled as you guys have and when they thought all chances were gone they got pregnant. One couple found out after deciding to adopt and had an open adoption going and when that mother was 4 months along they found out they were preggers with their biological baby, they still went through with the adoption and are now proud parents of a boy and girl that are 5 months apart, they are now 5 and starting school and the school called the mom to say there was something wrong with the birthdates, because they assumed they were twins. haha…but long story short you will be a wonderful mother, I have known you way to long to doubt that, and it will happen for you, keep the faith and whatever you decide will work for you!!!! As I tell Mandy and Don’s girls chin up it will be okay! I will keep you guys in my prayers!!!!!!!!

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